Have you ever looked in the mirror and not liked what you see.
I had this weird “thing” tonight. I stood in the bathroom looking at the mirror and I didn’t like the guy looking back at me. He was just sad, this guy had all the potential in the world and had the most amazing dreams of the future.
Only the man in the mirror’s dreams of the future just got smaller and smaller till they where just average.
He was nothing special, there was nothing special at all. Yes there were blips of excellence along the way but right now there was nothing outstanding. He was normal, there was no spark. Something has stomped on it, stomped so hard that the fire in his eyes were nothing but glass and hollow.
What is the Greatest thing about me right now. I dug a fecking hole (and I’m not even kidding)
I hated what I gave up. I gave up my world for safety and normal. Yet there is a little gremlin inside that is just screaming, wanting to get out. Wanting to be the rockstar, help the world, build something that will be remembered for long after I’m gong. I think I need to find the key to the cage in which that gremlin lives and set him loose
I’m calling this gremlin Matt, that fecker is total crazy and unstoppable.
Some times I wonder why I write this down. It will only serve to remind me in the future when I could just push it down like the 1001 other insecurities I have, forget them and keep faking it.
Write something positive next time boy!